Friday, March 31, 2006

Shutters, Fans and Music...Oh My

Thank goodness this week is over and the weekend is upon us. Last week was a week I'd rather forget....but now on to bigger and better things right? I've really been trying to stay off the rumour mill this week, even though it's too early for any new rumours. I don't think it's good for my psychie (or my heart for that matter) to hang on every single rumour I might hear or read. I figure if I didn't hear it from my agency, then it doesn't hold any water with me! So there!

Hmmmm, if I haven't been spending my time reading blogs and rumour mills, what the hell have I been doing with my time......? Well we finally got our shutters installed yesterday and who knew a window treatment can make such a difference?

If you seen the old, ugly, metalic mauve blinds we had on ALL our upstairs windows, you'd appreciate these beautiful shutters even more! I think they'll be great, especially in Jenna's room because they block out the daytime light pretty good when you have them closed....perfect for her afternoon naps!

AND, we also installed Jenna's ceiling fan, which I LOVE. Thanks to my "sissy" for buying it and shipping it all the way from California for me! And also to my MIL and her partner for installing it for me. I think it looks AWESOME! And the cute little butterflies switches are the cutest!

Oh, and if you haven't noticed, I've added music to my blog. I love the song I'm playing..... "Somewhere Over The Rainbow". Hope you like it too!

Saturday, March 25, 2006

I held out as much hope as I had left in me but to no avail. The rumor was in fact true...the CCAA only matched files logged-in between May 26-30. This news was so bad that our agency, who we rarely get personal emails from, felt the need to email us on Friday with this:

"The CCAA has indicated to us that they have matched only a 5 day period up to May 30, 2005. I realize this is intensely frustrating and that I had a crystal ball to help all CB families through the wait. I hope you find solace in the fact that it will happen, just not as quickly as you were hoping for.
We are also very frustrated with this information. We did try to have at least one group matched (232 as their LID is May 31), however it was too late as they have already been sent out. If you have any questions or comments, please don't hesitate to contact me."

This feeling sadly resembles the torture of waiting for results of an IVF cycle, only to find out that it didn't work and trying to compose yourself (body and mind) to start the whole damn thing all over again the next month (minus all the hormone shots and ultrasounds of course).

Here is the news the weekly CB newsletter brought us:

"Would I had as good news for the many families in the China queue, but the slow down persists, in fact it is even worse this month. Contrary to rumors, which optimistically predicted more matching this month, CCAA is in fact matching less than one week├é’s files, with the cut off date predicted to be only May 30th. Yet again this means no referrals for CB, which is hard to take. Unfortunately there is no negotiation on this, no matter how good the relationship with CCAA, believe me we have tried.On the up side we have been given no indication of a shut down, the otherrumorr now circulating. The delays do appear to be related to the fallout from the recent scandal in Hunan province. Investigations are ongoing and it seems this is contributing to the slow down. Families currently in China start their journeys home today."

If you haven't already heard, an orphanage in Hunan province had been charged with baby trafficking back in February. This is around the time when referral slowdown started to happen, however, the CCAA had stated on their website that there were just more waiting families than there were available children. Here's a link to more of the story:

I feel like a broken record when people ask me when we'll get referral to which my reply is " month for sure". Well I've been saying that for the last 3 or 4 months. With our LID being May 31, not only would we be the next group up with our agency, but we are the very next day for the CCAA to match. However, I've now learnt that nothing is "for sure".

So here we wait, yet another month, to see what the "Powers that be" (meaning the CCAA) has to say. I've had my tantrum, my fit of rage and all the tears I plan to shed on this news. Now I'm done and it's time to compose myself and use this upcoming month to spend more f'n money on clothing my daughter might not even fit into because she'll be 12 by the time I get her, watch my ass grow because I'm glued to this f'n computer for any morsel of information I can get my hands on and sit in the nursery for hours on end wondering why the hell my baby is not sleeping in her crib!!!! Phew, okay, now I'm done. (excuse the potty mouth but I think I'm entitled!)

Thursday, March 23, 2006

There are just no words.....

The buzz in rumorville is that the cut-off for the next round of referrals will be May 30th. That would mean that 5 days worth of logged-in dossiers were matched. The CCAA hasn't officially updated their website, so there is still a glimmer of hope, but at this moment in time....I'm all out of hope. My heart is broken....

Monday, March 20, 2006

This. Madness. Must. Stop.

Okay, so I've been doing a little bit of shopping lately....okay, alot of shopping. I can't stop!! I see all these cute things that I just absolutely MUST have my hands on. Here are just a few from the last couple of days....

The Lion plays "You are my sunshine" when you press the little sun around his neck and the Noah's Ark plays "Rock-a-bye baby" when you pull the star and the lights go on and off in the front. I just HAD to have these as they match the theme for her room. TOO CUTE!

And then I found these 3 things:

1. Noah pulling the hippo (for her first tooth), the lion (her first curl...although asian babies normally have straight hair, oh well, improvise) and the giraffe (for her first bracelet???? just in case she was born with one).

2. Lion, hippo and Noah in the boat that has 3 separate compartments for all her hair accessories (see below) and other goodies

3. And a wall hookie thingy (you know what I mean)

And of course, another outfit! I know, I know, since I don't know what size she is, she could very well be wearing this outfit in dead of winter next year, but boy will she look cute all froze up! (I'd put a jacket on her...sheesh!)

Thursday, March 16, 2006

Could time go ANY SLOWER!!! The next round of referrals are due in the next couple of weeks and this time, I am pretty damn sure ours will be included. The CCAA would only have to cover 6 more days to complete all files that were logged-in in May of last year (that would be us). So unless I have no luck at all, I'll be posting her picture here in the next few weeks. It almost seems that the wait since the last set of referrals came out (end of February) till now has been longer and more excruciating than all the months prior. I guess I know we're getting close I can almost touch it!! I've been reading the rumour mill swarming through the Chinese adoption community and someone was saying that they heard from their next door neighbors cousin who works with a girl who has an aunt that has a friend who ran into someone at Walmart that overheard a lady in the checkout say that the next set was suppose to be coming out yesterday! Well yesterday came and went with no more information than the day before....I should have known. But when you're as desperate as I am, any sort of rumour would have your panties in a tizzy too!

So keep checking back in the next few weeks, I'm sure I'll have more positive news!